Looking awesome lynne :)
I don't like the ending personally. Is the mum finding the washing pink not enough? Imagine her absolutely outraged and screaming and very unhappy with the situation, possibly with an extreme close up. Would that not be enough? It would be clearer, to me. I think it is currently too strung out an ending as if it has two, it actually seems pointless, to me as an outsider of the group.Also, more to the point, I think it would play with and balance the fact the whole animation to that point is put across as very jolly and jovial. You can't have it too happy as it will alienate the audience.If you like this ending I suggest exaggerating the reaction of the mum with these shots and leaving the washing blowing to an extra shot as if after a blank screen for a second for the titles or something.I think in general actually you could do with more shots and cuts in areas. My opinion.Anyway, good luck with the hand-in, y'all.
Thank you Fraser for your comments but I'm not going to lie, I don't totally understand them.So you don't like the fact that we have a resolve with the Mum & Girl in the washing machine world and then we come out of the washing machine to show the sock in the wash? That's the punchline. Although the boards may not show it totally 100% clearly, but the Mum, obviously, does struggle angrily to open the washing machine as she doesn't want her clothes to be ruined. We're not going for a slapstick comedy effect hence why we don't have an extreme close up of an exaggerated reaction from the Mum. Zooming into the washing line/playground at the end ties the little girl's imagination world in the washing machine to the real world around her, so the film comes full circle. Because she's using her imagination she's using real world places, that she knows, to conjure up the washing machine world.We also wanted to keep cuts to a minimum as this isn't a fast paced film and too many cuts can be unnecessary and distracting when over-used. Wayne agrees with us on this point and even spent time with us during one of our production meetings discussing the best way to cut down on cuts. We have since changed a large section in the middle of the animation, although we haven't had time to implement them yet due to the upcoming deadlines, so the areas you feel that require more shots and cuts may have already been changed.Also, I would have to disagree that the whole film is "put across as very jolly and jovial". The animation deals with the concepts of difference, acceptance and opening your mind to new ideas. At the very beginning the Girl is frightened by this Boy made up entirely of a new, never-before-seen colour. It is only when we see them play later that we realise she has overcome her initial fear of him and accepted him. The Mother too is frightened; she fears that her daughter is in trouble when she associates this new colour with the screams of her daughter from the playground. It's only when she sees the beauty that this new colour brings, and that her daughter is safe, that she accepts it and shares this new-found wonder with the daughter when they bond in a hug and she herself turns pink. There is a conflict which affects their lives and they overcome it. Surely that cannot alienate an audience?I hope this explains things a bit better. I know you've had some quandaries with our animation before so hopefully this will clear things up.All the best,Lynne
Ok. Thank you.Is the 'real' setting at the end also a white world? In that case, where did the red sock come from? And how did the tree and roundabout get red? Did the boy do that too? Is he just really mischievous, and pulling loads of tricks or something? I think that world should be full colour so as if she is drawing imagination from objects and applying it to being red and white through looking at the washing machine, going by the way you have coloured the storyboard... Or completely white, but that might be an unhappy, but jarring, ending as it'd be like the mother and daughter hadn't bonded...It may sound like a ridiculous amount of questions but I am just trying to understand it better...
I'm sorry Fraser but I can really no longer take you seriously. The animation really isn't as complex as you're making it.You do know that storyboards do not come in colour unless there is an element of colour which must be portrayed in order to understand the story fully. Hence why we highlighted the red boy, ball and sock in certain scenes. If we'd negated to colour in the ball, boy and sock then the idea of colour bleeding into the environment (representing the red sock in the white wash which the girl can be seen watching while she's imagining this world) would be entirely lost. It would just be white bleeding into white, which's mental. And yes, of course the real world is in colour. It's the real world. When I explained in my last comment that the washing machine world was in the girl's imagination I would have assumed you'd have realised that anything outside of the washing machine world was real life. The tree and the roundabout at the end are pink/red because they are real and in colour, and again, like I said before, used to link the two worlds together in one big circle. We highlighted those in colour at the end of the storyboards to make it really clear in the minds of the reader that this is what we were doing. Clearly we didn't make it clear enough.Have you read the script? Or attend any of our pitches? They both explained what was happening regarding colour and the two worlds. The script explains it pretty well, and if you didn't understand at our pitches you should've put your hand up and said at the time, then we could have explained it better to you in person instead of in long hand comment posts.To be honest for a guy whose animation is based on a Tap Wrench City having been destroyed by the introduction of saw-shaped buildings I really thought you would have a really good grasp at understanding imaginative worlds. I guess we underestimated how simple we thought our idea was.All the best,Lynne
Hahaha okay. It is hard to understand with these comments, you're right. I don't remember being at many pitches.I guess basing my assessment on this is hard. Just to be quick. I'll talk to u another time. You could have kept the end all white. Just a thought!It is simple, just the portrayal on the storyboard complicates it. I understand now though, Lynne.Not trying to be unwelcome. Terrible way of communicating, especially when u need to type a code in every time you post! haha